Sultans of Ping F.C. Birmingham Institute. 15th October 2022

I could blame being in an unfamiliar city, but I’ve never done this before, gone to the wrong venue! I’m not sure who’s playing at the Birmingham Academy, but it’s not Sultans of Ping F.C.! A quick hop across town though and I’m in the jam packed Institute and it is HOT! My expectations are high for this. Sky high! Sultans have been on the bucket list for too many years and so with a rare headline gig and the only one in the country, I find myself in a new venue, making new friends. Brummies are friendly folk, or at least the Sultans supporting ones are! I’m certainly not alone. There are a lot of out of towners and Irish accents everywhere, here to support the lads from Cork. Truth be told, I go to most gigs with a sense of what to expect. Here though, I’m not so sure. Maybe I should’ve guessed. Ferocious spiky punk pop, delivered by a band lead by the snarly Niall, who’s like a slightly antagonistic master of ceremonies. ‘Back in a Tracksuit’ feels like a tender start, but the crowd are ready to go as ‘Teenage Punks’ grabs us and tosses us around. It’s a bouncy fucker and the adoring crowd respond, “You scream, I scream, we all scream, SEX MACHINE!!!”. ‘Michico’ is another one with ridiculously quotable lyrics, “Now I know you better, I’ve come to the conclusion, 8 out of 10 of your best friends deserve electrocution”. “I think you’ve had your monies worth, everything now is a bonus” says Niall as they slip into ‘2 pints of Rasa’. The idea seems to be to lull us with some soft singalong stuff, before bludgeoning us all with punk venom like ‘Indeed You Are’. It’s very effective and to be honest I’m starting to feel a bit dizzy. Songs like ‘Wake Up and Scratch me’ don’t help, but I don’t care, this is everything and more I’d hope for. ‘Veronica’ picks up the tender thread before we’re picking up the perfect pass with ‘Give Him a Ball’. The Institute goes nuts, beer in the air abandon. It’s brilliant. ‘Stupid Kid’, ‘Let’s Go Shopping’, ‘Kick Me With Your Leather Boots’, they just keep coming, as Niall does things with a mic chord that would make Morrissey blush. Predictably it goes off for ‘Where’s Me Jumper?’ as we’re all dancing in the disco and indeed jumpers are lost. They’ve done an hour, but as if to prove a point they keep going, Niall with a can of Stella, he’s clearly ready to go all night, like a beautifully demented Duracell bunny. It’s at this point I realise I’m not just watching a band who’ve written some songs I love. They’re a genuinely brilliant live honed monster. I’d not expected that honestly. ‘You Talk Too Much’ closes the set, possibly the best set I could’ve hoped for. I’ve no idea what the folks at the Academy witnessed tonight, but it wasn’t as magnificent as The Sultans. “Cheers big ears”.